What to Expect when you're expecting (your first visit to the gynecologist)

I remember when I had my first Pap smear. I was seventeen, and I had spent the night before Googling what it was going to be like. I can't remember the name of it now, but I found this amazing feminist blog that prepared me so well for it, in such an empowering and radical way.

As a person in my early twenties (who has been to the gynecologist many many times,) I've had a bunch of friends text or call me when they're about to head to their first Pap smear, pelvic exam, STI test, yeast infection or any other gyno appointment. They reach out to me because I've done it before, and because they want to know what the hell goes on in the laminate torture chamber that is the gyno office.

I'm lucky to have a great gynecologist. He's an elderly man (originally I thought having a male one would be weird, but it's not.) He's super experienced, gentle, understands my fears, and answers my questions thoroughly. He has actually helped me heal a lot of my 'issues,' from fibrocystic breast changes to ovarian cysts to BV, and we're working together right now to figure out the best birth control for my endometriosis (taking into account the fact that most hormones turn me into a raging lunatic.) Shoutout to David. He's the GOAT.

But some aren't as lucky as I am, and I didn't always have such a great doctor. I had a really bad experience at a Planned Parenthood clinic, where the clinician accidentally hurt me during my IUD insertion, because she had to use a tenaculum which actually ended up scratching my cervix. Going to the gyn isn't always a bed of roses, and that's okay. I like to say that it's like getting a strep throat test. You know, the ones where they scratch the back of your throat with a q-tip? It doesn't feel good, but it shouldn't hurt. Maybe you gag a little bit. And then it's over! Really quick!  So, since education is the key to empowerment, let's get into the nitty-gritty of what actually happens, shall we? 

• You check in at the desk. You go back into the doctor's office. You answer a couple of questions, like what your sexual activity level is, how your birth control is working or if you want any, how your periods are, etc.
• The doctor then tells you to take off your clothes and put on a robe. If you're wearing a dress, you might just have to take off your underwear (that's what I always do. I feel like it helps me maintain some semblance of dignity.)  You hope onto the bed and put your feet in the stirrups. Sometimes, the doctor will instruct you to lay back and recline the table. If you're more comfortable in an upright seated position, let the doctor know. She should be able to examine you in that position with no problem.
• Most of the time, the doctor will have you place a sheet over your knees, so you can't see what she's doing. I don't mind this, I like the comfort and level of detachment it gives me. But if you want to be super-extra involved in your care, you can ask the doctor to remove it.
• The doctor usually inserts a speculum so she can see better, that scary duck-bill shaped device. The opening of the speculum should feel like a little bit of pressure on the top and bottom walls of your vagina. It shouldn't hurt. If it does, let your doctor know. Then, if you're getting a Pap, the doctor will swab your cervix with a long q-tip (see? Exactly like a strep test.) And then it's over!
• If you're getting a pelvic exam, the doctor will use two fingers to palpate the inside of your vagina as well as the outside your tummy to feel for any lumps, bumps or pain. 
• Then you're really done! (Unless you decide to go for a mammogram or breast exam.)

 Your doctor will tell you to get dressed (probably leave the room) and then answer any questions you may have. You did it! I'm so proud of you! Congratulations on fighting the power by taking care of your reproductive health! Yes!